Jenna von Oy Blogs: The Teething Twilight Zone

Jenna von Oy's Blog: The Teething Twilight Zone
Cuddling with Gray – Courtesy Jenna von Oy


Celebrity blogger Jenna von Oy is a new mama!


Best known for her roles as Six on Blossom and Stevie on The Parkers, von Oy is also a musician who has released two albums and is set to publish a book, The Betweeners.


von Oy, 35, wed Brad Bratcher on Oct. 10, 2010, and resides in Nashville with her husband and five dogs.


They welcomed their first child, daughter Gray Audrey, on May 21. She is now almost 7 months old.


In her latest blog, von Oy reflects on the trials and tribulations of teething.


You can find her on Facebook and Twitter @JennavonOy, as well as posting on her weekly blog, The Cradle Chronicles.


Author’s Note: The tragedy on December 14th in my hometown of Newtown, Conn. continues to weigh heavily on my heart, as it always will. In light of it, I considered leaving my mommy blog unpublished this month; it is difficult to look beyond the grief and sorrow right now. Though I wrote this post well before the horrific incident at Sandy Hook, I wasn’t sure I was ready to offer you fun, tongue-in-cheek anecdotes about my daughter’s teething woes in the midst of such a trying time.


It is hard not to let the profound sadness overshadow everything else. But it dawns on me that this is when we need love and laughter most. It’s one of the ways we pick ourselves up and move forward, even when it appears impossible. It is one of the ways we show one another support. So I’m doing my best to find the little things that make me smile through the pain, and my daughter has been a stunning light in all of the darkness. I treasure these moments with her now, even more than before.


My heart is forever with those who lost their lives in such a violent and senseless act. As parents, I imagine every one of us is grieving in our own way right now, so I hope this month’s blog will make you smile in the middle of your pain too … if even for a moment. — Jenna


We have entered the Twilight Zone, more popularly known as: teething. It is a warped world of twisted tales and meltdowns, where one never knows if something sinister is hiding around an otherwise innocuous corner. What lurks in the shadows is often scarier than the threat one can see. For example, consider our flight to Los Angeles in October. We were preparing to head west for my little sister’s wedding, and the plane ride loomed over us menacingly.


For three evenings prior to our trip, my daughter was in teething hell, beginning at around 6 p.m. … exactly the hour our flight was scheduled to depart. Go figure! And we’re talking epic saga screaming sessions here; the poor girl wailed until she passed out from exhaustion. It was devastating for my husband and I, because there’s only so much a parent can do to ease aching gums. We felt helpless. At some point we had to take a deep breath, check our sanity at the door, and realize it’s all part of the growth process — ours as well as hers.


Needless to say, the prospect of being in a confined space (for just shy of five hours), with a potentially screaming baby, was less than thrilling. In all honesty, I’d rather have a root canal than deal with fellow passengers who are furious over a fussy baby … make that my fussy baby. Sure, I’ve heard about the folks who dole out candy to their cabin-mates as a preemptive strike. Truthfully, I’m lucky I made it out the door with my matron-of-honor dress in tow, much less a dispensable goodie bag for people I’ve never met and will likely never see again.


I’m not suggesting I don’t care about their feelings — I probably care TOO much, in fact. But there’s something about bribing folks to pretend they don’t hear my child moaning in misery that disturbs me. I have to hope the simple words, “My daughter is in pain right now” accompanied by a sincere, “Thank you for your understanding” will suffice. But I digress.


The apprehension was overwhelming as we counted down the minutes until the impending debacle. But you know what? My sweet little girl surprised us by sleeping the whole way to California. And she smiled the entire way back home! My pre-flight paranoia stressed me out far more than the flight itself. As I said before, you just never know what’s lurking in the shadows. Every now and then, I guess it winds up being something better than expected.


It amazes me just how much a few little teeth can alter the reality I’ve come to know over the last seven months. The child who was (miraculously) allowing us to sleep through the night is suddenly waking up three or four times to comfort nurse. Or, as I prefer to call it, she has begun “whining and dining.”


Though I’ve tried offering diversions, Gray isn’t interested in any of it. She’s got a one-track mind and it’s focused on the milk dispenser. That said, I’m happy to let her nurse more often if it’s reducing her suffering. The side effect of this is, of course, that I tend to resemble a zombie for the majority of the morning … or at least until I’ve had a large enough dose of caffeine to sufficiently resurrect my brain function.


Jenna von Oy's Blog: The Teething Twilight Zone
Gray’s giraffe affinity – Courtesy Jenna von Oy


Another byproduct of the seemingly endless teething adventure seems to be a serious bout with separation anxiety. Gray has unexpectedly become very vocally opposed to being left with anyone else, which often includes my husband. And by that, I mean that I can’t walk out of the room without her bellowing like a banshee. Those moments typically give way to macaroni and cheese dinners, since they don’t easily allow for easy meal preparation. Or showering. Or writing a blog, for that matter.


When being more than two feet away from the “breastaurant” sends your child into spasmodic fits of shrieking and squawking, one tends to stick close to home and find every possible way to avoid the social purgatory.


There are definitely moments when no remedy, homeopathic or otherwise, seems to satisfy the teething demons. Other times, I find it merely requires the art of distraction. We’ve taken to trying every silly antic we can conjure up. This includes, but certainly isn’t limited to: making ridiculous faces, speaking in wacky cartoon voices, banging pots and pans and wildly dancing around our kitchen. I’m becoming the one-woman show no one wants to see.


So that I can reserve some of my “entertainment skills” for career opportunities, we recently invested in one of those baby activity walkers. This is much to the dismay of our pups, who bolt out of the room as soon they hear our daughter plunking away on the plastic piano keys. Our house is now filled with the cacophony of tinny children’s songs, farm noises, and dogs howling. Investing in a decent set of earplugs is sounding better and better every day.


Not that they would save me from myself, mind you … I currently have an obsession with turning everything into a catchy ditty. Brushing my teeth has become a performance worthy of Carnegie Hall, and you should hear my diaper changing song — there are multiple verses! Clearly, if I’m aggravating myself with my made up tunes, my poor husband must have the patience of Mother Teresa.


On the slightly less annoying side, we’ve strung up a bouncy seat in our kitchen doorframe, and Gray jumps around to her heart’s content. It’s as if we’ve given birth to our very own kangaroo.


Our house isn’t exempt from the fun either — every surface is coated with a thin layer of drool and, for once, I can’t credit our Basset Hound. Each room is currently strewn with a plethora teething toys, all of which somehow seem to be giraffe-related, and which my husband and I lunge for at the slightest whimper of crankiness. Gray doesn’t seem to discriminate.


In a pinch, we’ve found that an ice-cold washcloth is just as soothing to her as its more expensive, store-bought counterparts. You know when your child seems more preoccupied by the box the toy came in than the toy itself? It’s the same idea.


I recently Tweeted that dealing with a teething baby is the equivalent of playing badminton with firecrackers. I can’t say I’ve changed my mind about that. At times, it can be unpredictably explosive. That said, though the teething process is anxiety-laden for everyone involved, I must say my daughter is a trooper. More often than not, she is in good spirits and smiles through it all. I’m exceedingly thankful for that. She’s one stubborn kid, that’s for sure!


I’d like to think she knows we’re in this thing together … even when I do the crazy chicken dance, or sing stupid songs about tying my shoes.


Until next time,


– Jenna von Oy


More from Jenna’s PEOPLE.com blog series:


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Kenya hospital imprisons new mothers with no money


NAIROBI, Kenya (AP) — The director of the Pumwani Maternity Hospital, located in a hardscrabble neighborhood of downtown Nairobi, freely acknowledges what he's accused of: detaining mothers who can't pay their bills. Lazarus Omondi says it's the only way he can keep his medical center running.


Two mothers who live in a mud-wall and tin-roof slum a short walk from the maternity hospital, which is affiliated with the Nairobi City Council, told The Associated Press that Pumwani wouldn't let them leave after delivering their babies. The bills the mothers couldn't afford were $60 and $160. Guards would beat mothers with sticks who tried to leave without paying, one of the women said.


Now, a New York-based group has filed a lawsuit on the women's behalf in hopes of forcing Pumwani to stop the practice, a practice Omondi is candid about.


"We hold you and squeeze you until we get what we can get. We must be self-sufficient," Omondi said in an interview in his hospital office. "The hospital must get money to pay electricity, to pay water. We must pay our doctors and our workers."


"They stay there until they pay. They must pay," he said of the 350 mothers who give birth each week on average. "If you don't pay the hospital will collapse."


The Center for Reproductive Rights, which filed the suit this month in the High Court of Kenya, says detaining women for not paying is illegal. Pumwani is associated with the Nairobi City Council, one reason it might be able to get away with such practices, and the patients are among Nairobi's poorest with hardly anyone to stand up for them.


Maimouna Awuor was an impoverished mother of four when she was to give birth to her fifth in October 2010. Like many who live in Nairobi's slums, Awuor performs odd jobs in the hopes of earning enough money to feed her kids that day. Awuor, who is named in the lawsuit, says she had saved $12 and hoped to go to a lower-cost clinic but was turned away and sent to Pumwani. After giving birth, she couldn't pay the $60 bill, and was held with what she believes was about 60 other women and their infants.


"We were sleeping three to a bed, sometimes four," she said. "They abuse you, they call you names," she said of the hospital staff.


She said saw some women tried to flee but they were beaten by the guards and turned back. While her husband worked at a faraway refugee camp, Awuor's 9-year-old daughter took care of her siblings. A friend helped feed them, she said, while the children stayed in the family's 50-square-foot shack, where rent is $18 a month. She says she was released after 20 days after Nairobi's mayor paid her bill. Politicians in Kenya in general are expected to give out money and get a budget to do so.


A second mother named in the lawsuit, Margaret Anyoso, says she was locked up in Pumwani for six days in 2010 because she could not pay her $160 bill. Her pregnancy was complicated by a punctured bladder and heavy bleeding.


"I did not see my child until the sixth day after the surgery. The hospital staff were keeping her away from me and it was only when I caused a scene that they brought her to me," said Anyoso, a vegetable seller and a single mother with five children who makes $5 on a good day.


Anyoso said she didn't have clothes for her child so she wrapped her in a blood-stained blouse. She was released after relatives paid the bill.


One woman says she was detained for nine months and was released only after going on a hunger strike. The Center for Reproductive Rights says other hospitals also detain non-paying patients.


Judy Okal, the acting Africa director for the Center for Reproductive Rights, said her group filed the lawsuit so all Kenyan women, regardless of socio-economic status, are able to receive health care without fear of imprisonment. The hospital, the attorney general, the City Council of Nairobi and two government ministries are named in the suit.


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Associated Press reporter Tom Odula contributed to this report.


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Wall Street falls as senator sees "fiscal cliff" fall

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Stocks declined on Thursday after the leader of Senate Democrats warned the United States appeared headed over the "fiscal cliff" and data showed consumer confidence fell to a four-month low.


With only a few days left before devastating tax hikes and spending cuts go into effect, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said about the fiscal cliff, "It looks like where we're headed."


Reid criticized Republicans for refusing to go along with any tax increases as part of a compromise solution with Democrats to avoid the fiscal cliff, which economists warn will knock the economy into recession.


President Barack Obama was flying back to Washington from a Christmas holiday to push for more talks, while the top Republican in Congress planned to speak with House lawmakers to avoid the year-end deadline. Still, gaps remained between the two sides.


The benchmark S&P 500 index is on track for its fourth straight decline and is down 2 percent as negotiations over the budget crisis stalled. A four-day decline would mark the longest losing streak for the index in three months.


The Conference Board, an industry group, said its index of consumer attitudes in December fell to 65.1 as the budget crisis took the steam out of a growing sense of optimism about the economy. The gauge fell more than expected from a downwardly revised 71.5 in November.


Initial claims for unemployment benefits dropped 12,000 to a seasonally adjusted 350,000 last week and the four-week moving average fell to the lowest since March 2008.


"Unfortunately, a term all of us are sick of hearing - the fiscal cliff - appears to be dominating all aspects of the financial market and consumer confidence," said Joe Heider, principal at Rehmann Financial in Cleveland Ohio.


"What has happened here is even though the consumer confidence number had a sharp decline, most people write it off as a result of what is happening in Washington rather than economic reality that is occurring in people's everyday lives."


Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner announced the first of a series of measures that should push back the government's debt ceiling by around two months.


The Dow Jones industrial average <.dji> dropped 77.41 points, or 0.59 percent, to 13,037.18. The Standard & Poor's 500 Index <.spx> lost 9.71 points, or 0.68 percent, to 1,410.12. The Nasdaq Composite Index <.ixic> fell 18.36 points, or 0.61 percent, to 2,971.80.


Marvell Technology Group fell 3.4 percent to $7.15 after it said it would seek to overturn a jury's finding of patent infringement. The stock had fallen more than 10 percent in the prior session after a federal jury found the company infringed two patents held by Carnegie Mellon University and ordered the chipmaker to pay $1.17 billion in damages.


The PHLX semiconductor index <.sox> lost 0.7 percent.


(Reporting by Chuck Mikolajczak; Editing by Kenneth Barry)



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Syria to discuss Brahimi peace proposals with Russia


BEIRUT (Reuters) - Syrian President Bashar al-Assad sent a senior diplomat to Moscow on Wednesday to discuss proposals to end the conflict convulsing his country made by international envoy Lakhdar Brahimi, Syrian and Lebanese sources said.


Brahimi, who saw Assad on Monday and is planning to hold a series of meetings with Syrian officials and dissidents in Damascus this week, is trying to broker a peaceful transfer of power, but has disclosed little about how this might be done.


More than 44,000 Syrians have been killed in a revolt against four decades of Assad family rule, a conflict that began with peaceful protests but which has descended into civil war.


Past peace efforts have floundered, with world powers divided over what has become an increasingly sectarian struggle between mostly Sunni Muslim rebels and Assad's security forces, drawn primarily from his Shi'ite-rooted Alawite minority.


Deputy Foreign Minister Faisal Makdad flew to Moscow to discuss the details of the talks with Brahimi, said a Syrian security source, who would not say if a deal was in the works.


However, a Lebanese official close to Damascus said Makdad had been sent to seek Russian advice on a possible agreement.


He said Syrian officials were upbeat after talks with Brahimi, the U.N.-Arab League envoy, who met Foreign Minister Walid Moualem on Tuesday a day after his session with Assad, but who has not outlined his ideas in public.


"There is a new mood now and something good is happening," the official said, asking not to be named. He gave no details.


Russia, which has given Assad diplomatic and military aid to help him weather the 21-month-old uprising, has said it is not protecting him, but has fiercely criticized any foreign backing for rebels and, with China, has blocked U.N. Security Council action on Syria.


"ASSAD CANNOT STAY"


A Russian Foreign Ministry source said Makdad and an aide would meet Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov and Mikhail Bogdanov, the Kremlin's special envoy for Middle East affairs, on Thursday, but did not disclose the nature of the talks.


On Saturday, Lavrov said Syria's civil war had reached a stalemate, saying international efforts to get Assad to quit would fail. Bogdanov had earlier acknowledged that Syrian rebels were gaining ground and might win.


Given the scale of the bloodshed and destruction, Assad's opponents insist the Syrian president must go.


Moaz Alkhatib, head of the internationally-recognized Syrian National Coalition opposition, has criticized any notion of a transitional government in which Assad would stay on as a figurehead president stripped of real powers.


Comments on Alkhatib's Facebook page on Monday suggested that the opposition believed this was one of Brahimi's ideas.


"The government and its president cannot stay in power, with or without their powers," Alkhatib wrote, saying his Coalition had told Brahimi it rejected any such solution.


While Brahimi was working to bridge the vast gaps between Assad and his foes, fighting raged across the country and a senior Syrian military officer defected to the rebels.


Syrian army shelling killed about 20 people, at least eight of them children, in the northern province of Raqqa, a video posted by opposition campaigners showed.


The video, published by the Syrian Observatory for Human Rights, showed rows of blood-stained bodies laid out on blankets. The sound of crying relatives could be heard in the background.


The shelling hit the province's al-Qahtania village, but it was unclear when the attack had occurred.


STRATEGIC BASE


Rebels relaunched their assault on the Wadi Deif military base in the northwestern province of Idlib, in a battle for a major army compound and fuel storage and distribution point.


Activist Ahmed Kaddour said rebels were firing mortars and had attacked the base with a vehicle rigged with explosives.


The British-based Observatory, which uses a network of contacts in Syria to monitor the conflict, said a rebel commander was among several people killed in Wednesday's fighting, which it said was among the heaviest for months.


The military used artillery and air strikes to try to hold back rebels assaulting Wadi Deif and the town of Morek in Hama province further south. In one air raid, several rockets fell near a field hospital in the town of Saraqeb, in Idlib province, wounding several people, the Observatory said.


As violence has intensified in recent weeks, daily death tolls have climbed. The Observatory reported at least 190 had been killed across the country on Tuesday alone.


The head of Syria's military police changed sides and declared allegiance to the anti-Assad revolt.


"I am General Abdelaziz Jassim al-Shalal, head of the military police. I have defected because of the deviation of the army from its primary duty of protecting the country and its transformation into gangs of killing and destruction," the officer said in a video published on YouTube.


A Syrian security source confirmed the defection, but said Shalal was near retirement and had only defected to "play hero".


Syrian Interior Minister Mohammed Ibrahim al-Shaar left Lebanon for Damascus after being treated in Beirut for wounds sustained in a rebel bomb attack this month.


(Additional reporting by Laila Bassam; Writing by Alistair Lyon; Editing by Andrew Osborn)



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Carlyle takes on KKR in race for Reynolds and Reynolds: sources






NEW YORK (Reuters) – Private equity firms Carlyle Group LP and KKR & Co LP have emerged as the lead contenders to take over Reynolds and Reynolds, a software company hoping to sell itself for $ 5 billion, three people familiar with the matter said.


Dayton, Ohio-based Reynolds, which provides business management software for auto dealers in North America and Europe, had hired technology-focused investment bank Qatalyst Partners to run a sale, people familiar with the matter told Reuters in October.






The process has progressed and is now in its final stages, though no decision is expected before January, the sources said.


Reynolds may be sold to Carlyle or KKR for between $ 4 billion and $ 5 billion, less than the company had hoped, one of the people added.


The people spoke on condition of anonymity because the negotiations are confidential. Spokesmen for Reynolds, Carlyle and KKR declined to comment.


Reynolds sells software tools that allow car dealers to run their operations, including providing car dealer websites, digital advertising and marketing services, as well as data archiving.


Reynolds was founded in 1866 by Lucius Reynolds and his brother-in-law as a company that prints standardized business forms. It started to serve automotive retailers as major clients in the 1920s.


In October 2006, the company was acquired by Universal Computer Systems (UCS) for $ 2.8 billion. The merged company retained the Reynolds name and is currently headed by Chairman and Chief Executive Bob Brockman, who used to run UCS.


Brockman’s $ 2.8 billion buyout was funded primarily by a group of investors that included Goldman Sachs Capital Partners, the private equity arm of Goldman Sachs Group Inc, and Vista Equity Partners.


(Reporting by Greg Roumeliotis and Soyoung Kim in New York; editing by John Wallace)


Tech News Headlines – Yahoo! News





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Kim Kardashian Tries a New Hair Color







Style News Now





12/26/2012 at 11:30 AM ET











Kim Kardashian Hair
SPW/Splash News Online. Inset: Startraks


The bangs may have been fake (turns out they were just clip-ins), but Kim Kardashian‘s new hair shade is definitely for real.


Just before Christmas, the reality star decided to go back to her roots — literally — and color her mane a super-deep brown, almost black hue.


For the past few months (while filming Kim and Kourtney Take Miami) the star had been sporting light caramel locks, but Kardashian was clearly ready for a change.


“After Miami I was honestly just soooo over it being light and listened to the suggestions to take my hair back to my natural color!” the star wrote on her website.


Hmm, wonder who it was that offered up the suggestions … Her boyfriend and occasional stylist Kanye West, perhaps? After all, he’s supposedly the one responsible for getting her to wear so much black in her wardrobe.


The last time Kardashian had hair this dark was in August, and we’re happy to see her go back to her natural color. Tell us: Do you prefer Kardashian with dark or light hair?


–Jennifer Cress


PHOTOS: SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON 2012′s CELEBRITY HAIR MAKEOVERS!




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Predicting who's at risk for violence isn't easy


CHICAGO (AP) — It happened after Columbine, Virginia Tech, Aurora, Colo., and now Sandy Hook: People figure there surely were signs of impending violence. But experts say predicting who will be the next mass shooter is virtually impossible — partly because as commonplace as these calamities seem, they are relatively rare crimes.


Still, a combination of risk factors in troubled kids or adults including drug use and easy access to guns can increase the likelihood of violence, experts say.


But warning signs "only become crystal clear in the aftermath, said James Alan Fox, a Northeastern University criminology professor who has studied and written about mass killings.


"They're yellow flags. They only become red flags once the blood is spilled," he said.


Whether 20-year-old Adam Lanza, who used his mother's guns to kill her and then 20 children and six adults at their Connecticut school, made any hints about his plans isn't publicly known.


Fox said that sometimes, in the days, weeks or months preceding their crimes, mass murderers voice threats, or hints, either verbally or in writing, things like "'don't come to school tomorrow,'" or "'they're going to be sorry for mistreating me.'" Some prepare by target practicing, and plan their clothing "as well as their arsenal." (Police said Lanza went to shooting ranges with his mother in the past but not in the last six months.)


Although words might indicate a grudge, they don't necessarily mean violence will follow. And, of course, most who threaten never act, Fox said.


Even so, experts say threats of violence from troubled teens and young adults should be taken seriously and parents should attempt to get them a mental health evaluation and treatment if needed.


"In general, the police are unlikely to be able to do anything unless and until a crime has been committed," said Dr. Paul Appelbaum, a Columbia University professor of psychiatry, medicine and law. "Calling the police to confront a troubled teen has often led to tragedy."


The American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry says violent behavior should not be dismissed as "just a phase they're going through."


In a guidelines for families, the academy lists several risk factors for violence, including:


—Previous violent or aggressive behavior


—Being a victim of physical or sexual abuse


—Guns in the home


—Use of drugs or alcohol


—Brain damage from a head injury


Those with several of these risk factors should be evaluated by a mental health expert if they also show certain behaviors, including intense anger, frequent temper outbursts, extreme irritability or impulsiveness, the academy says. They may be more likely than others to become violent, although that doesn't mean they're at risk for the kind of violence that happened in Newtown, Conn.


Lanza, the Connecticut shooter, was socially withdrawn and awkward, and has been said to have had Asperger's disorder, a mild form of autism that has no clear connection with violence.


Autism experts and advocacy groups have complained that Asperger's is being unfairly blamed for the shootings, and say people with the disorder are much more likely to be victims of bullying and violence by others.


According to a research review published this year in Annals of General Psychiatry, most people with Asperger's who commit violent crimes have serious, often undiagnosed mental problems. That includes bipolar disorder, depression and personality disorders. It's not publicly known if Lanza had any of these, which in severe cases can include delusions and other psychotic symptoms.


Young adulthood is when psychotic illnesses typically emerge, and Appelbaum said there are several signs that a troubled teen or young adult might be heading in that direction: isolating themselves from friends and peers, spending long periods alone in their rooms, plummeting grades if they're still in school and expressing disturbing thoughts or fears that others are trying to hurt them.


Appelbaum said the most agonizing calls he gets are from parents whose children are descending into severe mental illness but who deny they are sick and refuse to go for treatment.


And in the case of adults, forcing them into treatment is difficult and dependent on laws that vary by state.


All states have laws that allow some form of court-ordered treatment, typically in a hospital for people considered a danger to themselves or others. Connecticut is among a handful with no option for court-ordered treatment in a less restrictive community setting, said Kristina Ragosta, an attorney with the Treatment Advocacy Center, a national group that advocates better access to mental health treatment.


Lanza's medical records haven't been publicly disclosed and authorities haven't said if it is known what type of treatment his family may have sought for him. Lanza killed himself at the school.


Jennifer Hoff of Mission Viejo, Calif. has a 19-year-old bipolar son who has had hallucinations, delusions and violent behavior for years. When he was younger and threatened to harm himself, she'd call 911 and leave the door unlocked for paramedics, who'd take him to a hospital for inpatient mental care.


Now that he's an adult, she said he has refused medication, left home, and authorities have indicated he can't be forced into treatment unless he harms himself — or commits a violent crime and is imprisoned. Hoff thinks prison is where he's headed — he's in jail, charged in an unarmed bank robbery.


___


Online:


American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry: http://www.aacap.org


___


AP Medical Writer Lindsey Tanner can be reached at http://www.twitter.com/LindseyTanner


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Wall Street down on soft retail data, "cliff" worries suspected


NEW YORK (Reuters) - Socks fell on Wednesday as retailers dropped sharply after a report that showed holiday shoppers were less enthusiastic than last year, with investors saying worries about the "fiscal cliff" may have kept them away from stores.


The Dow Jones industrial average <.dji> dropped 29.08 points, or 0.22 percent, to 13,110.00. The Standard & Poor's 500 Index <.spx> dropped 6.41 points, or 0.45 percent, to 1,420.25. The Nasdaq Composite Index <.ixic> dropped 20.63 points, or 0.68 percent, to 2,991.97.


(Reporting by Edward Krudy; Editing by Chizu Nomiyama)



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Syria envoy seeks peace as clashes rage


BEIRUT (Reuters) - International envoy Lakhdar Brahimi pursued mediation efforts in Damascus on Tuesday, but there was no pause in the bloodletting as Syrian Christians marked a bleak Christmas Day with prayers for peace.


"We are here in a cave that symbolizes Syria right now," said a priest standing beside a nativity scene in a grotto.


"It is cold here but the door is open to all refugees," he told Syrian state TV. "Amid the hunger, cold and deprivation, we still have hope for peace and love for our country."


More than 44,000 Syrians have been killed since a revolt against President Bashar al-Assad erupted 21 months ago, igniting an increasingly sectarian conflict that broadly pits a Sunni Muslim majority against Assad's Alawite minority.


Christians, many of whom have been reluctant to join what they see as an Islamist-tinged insurgency, feel threatened.


Bishop John Kawak, speaking on state TV, said the Christmas holiday was "a symbol for the rebirth of the nation". He condemned "terrorism", the government's term for the rebellion.


Brahimi met some dissidents who are tolerated by Assad but rejected by the mainstream opposition and by rebels fighting to oust him, a day after he held talks with the Syrian president.


There was no word on any progress in the U.N.-Arab League' envoy's drive to end violence that has intensified in recent months as Assad uses airpower and artillery against rebel gains.


Raja Naser, secretary general of the National Coordination Body, said after meeting Brahimi that the envoy planned a week of meetings in Damascus and would stay until Sunday.


"There is still a lot of concern but there is also great hope that these meetings with other Syrian officials will result in some agreements or positive developments," he said.


But most opposition groups appear frustrated with Brahimi's quest for a deal on a transitional government. He has not clarified any role for Assad, whose foes say he must simply go, arguing that too much blood has been shed for any other outcome.


GULF PLEA


Gulf Arab leaders, who have long called for Assad's removal and some of whom have helped the rebels with guns and money, urged swift world action to halt the "massacres" and violations of international law in Syria.


The pro-opposition Syrian Observatory for Human Rights reported clashes and government shelling in hotspots across the country, including towns on the eastern outskirts of Damascus.


Abu Nidal, a spokesman for the Rebel Military Council in Damascus, said fighters had killed the head of a local security branch in the capital's suburb of Jaramana, home to a large Christian and Druze population.


In his Christmas message to the world on Tuesday, Pope Benedict encouraged Syrians not to lose hope for peace.


"May peace spring up for the people of Syria, deeply wounded and divided by a conflict which does not spare even the defenseless and reaps innocent victims," he said.


"I appeal for an end to the bloodshed, easier access for the relief of refugees and the displaced, and dialogue in the pursuit of a political solution to the conflict."


Hundreds of thousands of Syrians have fled abroad to escape the daily violence. Those who remain face severe shortages of food, fuel and other essentials as winter weather takes a grip.


Syrian activists offered a message of solidarity with Christians despite rising tensions in central Hama province, where rebels have demanded that Christian villages let them enter to force out the army and pro-Assad "shabbiha" militias.


"We say to the Christians, you are our brothers and our beloved, and your holiday is our holiday," said Abu Faisal, a Hama activist who posted a Christmas message on the Internet.


"The rebels are surrounding (the Christian town) Muhardeh to get rid of Assad's soldiers and shabbiha, but we have not forgotten your honorable stance when you took care of our refugees when the army entered Hama," he said.


"We will not accept that you are targeted by hatred, you are our brothers and our friends."


(Additional reporting by Philip Pullela in Vatican City and Asma Alsharif in Manama)



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Predicting who's at risk for violence isn't easy


CHICAGO (AP) — It happened after Columbine, Virginia Tech, Aurora, Colo., and now Sandy Hook: People figure there surely were signs of impending violence. But experts say predicting who will be the next mass shooter is virtually impossible — partly because as commonplace as these calamities seem, they are relatively rare crimes.


Still, a combination of risk factors in troubled kids or adults including drug use and easy access to guns can increase the likelihood of violence, experts say.


But warning signs "only become crystal clear in the aftermath, said James Alan Fox, a Northeastern University criminology professor who has studied and written about mass killings.


"They're yellow flags. They only become red flags once the blood is spilled," he said.


Whether 20-year-old Adam Lanza, who used his mother's guns to kill her and then 20 children and six adults at their Connecticut school, made any hints about his plans isn't publicly known.


Fox said that sometimes, in the days, weeks or months preceding their crimes, mass murderers voice threats, or hints, either verbally or in writing, things like "'don't come to school tomorrow,'" or "'they're going to be sorry for mistreating me.'" Some prepare by target practicing, and plan their clothing "as well as their arsenal." (Police said Lanza went to shooting ranges with his mother in the past but not in the last six months.)


Although words might indicate a grudge, they don't necessarily mean violence will follow. And, of course, most who threaten never act, Fox said.


Even so, experts say threats of violence from troubled teens and young adults should be taken seriously and parents should attempt to get them a mental health evaluation and treatment if needed.


"In general, the police are unlikely to be able to do anything unless and until a crime has been committed," said Dr. Paul Appelbaum, a Columbia University professor of psychiatry, medicine and law. "Calling the police to confront a troubled teen has often led to tragedy."


The American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry says violent behavior should not be dismissed as "just a phase they're going through."


In a guidelines for families, the academy lists several risk factors for violence, including:


—Previous violent or aggressive behavior


—Being a victim of physical or sexual abuse


—Guns in the home


—Use of drugs or alcohol


—Brain damage from a head injury


Those with several of these risk factors should be evaluated by a mental health expert if they also show certain behaviors, including intense anger, frequent temper outbursts, extreme irritability or impulsiveness, the academy says. They may be more likely than others to become violent, although that doesn't mean they're at risk for the kind of violence that happened in Newtown, Conn.


Lanza, the Connecticut shooter, was socially withdrawn and awkward, and has been said to have had Asperger's disorder, a mild form of autism that has no clear connection with violence.


Autism experts and advocacy groups have complained that Asperger's is being unfairly blamed for the shootings, and say people with the disorder are much more likely to be victims of bullying and violence by others.


According to a research review published this year in Annals of General Psychiatry, most people with Asperger's who commit violent crimes have serious, often undiagnosed mental problems. That includes bipolar disorder, depression and personality disorders. It's not publicly known if Lanza had any of these, which in severe cases can include delusions and other psychotic symptoms.


Young adulthood is when psychotic illnesses typically emerge, and Appelbaum said there are several signs that a troubled teen or young adult might be heading in that direction: isolating themselves from friends and peers, spending long periods alone in their rooms, plummeting grades if they're still in school and expressing disturbing thoughts or fears that others are trying to hurt them.


Appelbaum said the most agonizing calls he gets are from parents whose children are descending into severe mental illness but who deny they are sick and refuse to go for treatment.


And in the case of adults, forcing them into treatment is difficult and dependent on laws that vary by state.


All states have laws that allow some form of court-ordered treatment, typically in a hospital for people considered a danger to themselves or others. Connecticut is among a handful with no option for court-ordered treatment in a less restrictive community setting, said Kristina Ragosta, an attorney with the Treatment Advocacy Center, a national group that advocates better access to mental health treatment.


Lanza's medical records haven't been publicly disclosed and authorities haven't said if it is known what type of treatment his family may have sought for him. Lanza killed himself at the school.


Jennifer Hoff of Mission Viejo, Calif. has a 19-year-old bipolar son who has had hallucinations, delusions and violent behavior for years. When he was younger and threatened to harm himself, she'd call 911 and leave the door unlocked for paramedics, who'd take him to a hospital for inpatient mental care.


Now that he's an adult, she said he has refused medication, left home, and authorities have indicated he can't be forced into treatment unless he harms himself — or commits a violent crime and is imprisoned. Hoff thinks prison is where he's headed — he's in jail, charged in an unarmed bank robbery.


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Online:


American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry: http://www.aacap.org


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AP Medical Writer Lindsey Tanner can be reached at http://www.twitter.com/LindseyTanner


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